Facebook Groups are heroin for apathetic ponces

One thing that the internet as a whole has allowed human beings to do a lot more of are petitions. The acquiring of many signatures/names of people who all share the common belief to such a degree that maybe, just maybe, someone important will read it and start to take notice of what these people want.

It was a good idea many years ago, when the only way to get a petition done was to get off your bone idle arse and ask people in the street to sign thier name in support of the chosen cause. 50,000 signitures meant something when back then, they showed true dedication and that you were totally uncompromising in your mission.

That’s not the case anymore is it? That intensity has been vastly watered down and overshadowed by the infinite stream of bullshit causes and futile internet campaigns that can be found online right now. The biggest culprit of this epidemic is Facebook. This place is heroin for the “armchair activist” those who want to change the world and make a difference but sadly they can’t really be that fucked to do any physical movement which might be described as “proactive”.

To be honest a lot of activism gets right on my tits sometimes but at least it shows a bit of character.
I hate it when i hear that a so-called “animal rights group” have set fire to someones house at night, then stolen the corpse of that person’s mother from their grave and then sent pictures of the body to the poor bastard whose Mum it is…all because this guy does medical testing on guinea pigs in order to find cures for terminal human diseases like cancer and AIDS, something these activists deserve quite frankly. I detest that sort of extreme protesting from anyone, but at least they actually had the gnads to go through with it all. If those people had had access to facebook then they’d have just started a new group called…

“I bet i can find 100,000 people who think killing guinea pigs for scientific research is really evil and the people who do it should have thier dead parents rotting corpses stolen and held to ransom”

…or something like that.

There is no belief in protesting anymore. 3 million marched in the street to say “Not In My Name” to the Iraq War…what happened? Fuck all, it’s been nearly 6 years and how many more marches have thier been? hundreds and hundreds, what’s happened? Fuck all!

This is why we have found comfort in our facebook group utopia of “DIY protest”. We’re like these fat lazy wankers who by those strap on pads that electicute your stomach and are supposed to give you a 6-pack whilst you watch TV and masturbate and, for a brief initial period, you think they might just work…but deep down you know full well that you are not going to influence anything, prevent anything or make any impact whatsoever on anything.

So if it makes you feel better and has a nice placebo effect on your conscience then by all means carry on, we all need a vice to sooth the pain. But please do not for one pissed soaked genocidal AIDS ridden second believe that your facebook group is one day going be seen as the modern day equivalent of Rosa Parks sitting at the front of the Bus…ok?